Single Awareness Day: An attempt to celebrate singlehood – but does it really?

Some call February the month of love. Some joke around saying that’s why it’s the shortest month of the year. Others relish in the celebration of it all – hearts, candy, staring at their partners like heart-eye emojis. 

February 14 is Valentine’s Day. A day that either makes your skin tingle or crawl, depending on how you feel about it. I belong to the latter. 

I have not ever been a fan of Valentine’s. I can’t truly pinpoint why. I just don’t see the point of it. 

When I was in relationships, my partners loved that I didn’t have a care for it and forgot about it. I feel you don’t need a specific day to show your love for your partner. It should be always, every day, or even better, expressed with random unexpected appreciation.

So perhaps there should be a day for someone like me? Introducing Single Awareness Day that falls on February 15.

I have to admit, before writing this, I had not heard of SAD (yes, that is the acronym for it). Have you? It is meant to be the antithesis to Valentine’s Day. 

On the SAD website (that hasn’t been updated since 2005), the goal for this day is to celebrate your singlehood with other single friends. Seems like a nice enough sentiment, doesn’t it? It goes on to explain that the “day was established by single people who were just sick of feeling left out on Valentine's Day.”

I understand the feeling, but really? Why is there the need to perpetuate anything surrounding Valentine’s or relationships? Surely us singletons are confident enough in our status that we don’t need recognition. Or do we?

Here’s another date for you. February 13 is (drum rolls please) Galentine’s Day. This day was created by a fictional character on an American TV show back in 2010 where ladies celebrate ladies. Again, a nice sentiment I feel, but for me, that’s a monthly Saturday catch-up with my gals over food with wine. And it always feels like a treat.

With these trio of dates that emphasise relationships versus being single, it is no wonder people still feel challenged or insecure in their statuses. Does it really matter if you’re partnered up or not? If you’re happy in either status, that’s all that should matter. 

If you’re happy within yourself, your approach to the world will be happier too. Perhaps this suggestion by Business Insider writer Marina Nazario is more appropriate.

“I think Singles Awareness Day isolates a group of people who might not want to be isolated. Plus, the word “awareness” doesn’t exactly imply a celebration. In my opinion, Singles Awareness Day shouldn’t exist. But if it must, a more positive and inclusive name for the holiday would be Love Yourself Day. Then we would have two holidays, in a row, celebrating all kinds of love.”

I like the idea of that. Or just the celebration of any relationships, not only romantic ones, should be given equal importance too. As author, Bella DePaulo, said in a Refinery29 article: “Any celebration that recognises the significance of friendships or other important relationships other than romantic ones has the potential to be a good thing, and not just for single women. We all need to value people beyond those we are (supposedly) having sex with.”

Whatever date you’re celebrating (or not), self-love is the most important of all. Here’s four suggestions on how to do just that – single or partnered up.

1. Gather your friends – girls and boys – for a themed party

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Have a fun time with each other creating great memories in all your friendships. Either throw a themed party at home where everyone dresses up and contributes to a potluck or dress up anyway and head to your favourite bar or club or find a new place to explore. It’s the company that counts, after all.

2. Have a relaxing spa day – with or without friends

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There is always an excuse to get pampered. Treat yourself to a body scrub and massage or create your own home spa. Diffuse essential oils, lie down with a sheet mask, scrub away your anxiety with a loofah in the shower, then binge on Netflix (here are 11 shows to binge watch in 2020) or books or podcasts (here are some podcasts for women by women).

3. Go ahead, buy it

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If you’ve been eyeing something for a while, now is a good time as any to get it. If you can afford it, why not? You should indulge in yourself ever so often. Be it jewellery, clothing, a travel plan, an art show, whatever it is that makes your heart skip a beat - buy it, book it, reserve it.

4. Make someone else feel better

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You can buy things for others or treat friends or partners to what they like. That always feels good. But how about donating or volunteering in some charity work (here are 20 ways you can be a volunteer in Singapore)? That would fill your heart with joy, spread some happiness (read all about our Happiness Project here) and lift spirits all round. Wouldn’t that be the best feeling?