How to spot the signs of a toxic relationship

Jealousy and lack of trust

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"Relationships are supposed to be our safe place to be vulnerable, having someone to rely on, and growing together in every aspect. In a toxic relationship, They will be very competitive, and not in a healthy way because they don’t let you be better or be with someone better than them. One of the parties will be afraid of their partner leaving them. Thus, they will control you in all aspects — from who you see, who you like etc. and not let you grow to be the best version of yourself."

There is no ‘Take and Give’ just ‘All Take, No Give’

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"Healthy relationships are about being happy together and fulfilling each other's needs and wants. When you feel like you’re always pleasing your partner and that your life revolves around only making your partner happy without considering your needs, you need to stop.

Frequently, you will think it's normal and you hope they will change. But, it wont' and you'll only continue to keep giving without getting anything back in return."

Making excuses of your partner's behavior

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"If you ever heard your close friend criticise your partner, and you always argue that ‘you don’t know him/her like I do’ but you don’t really feel that way, then that is a red flag. If you feel like you are forced to defend your partner, you need to rethink about your relationship.

 

Communication feels exhausting

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"In any relationship, communication is the key. When you feel like everything you say is being turned against you, you slowly stop trying to share your feelings honestly because you know where it’s going to lead. When you say things like “I’m feeling really down about work lately” and the type of response you get would be along the lines of “You seem perfectly fine when your friends are around.” then that's a sign that you're being gaslighted about your feelings."

 

You’re being constantly set up for traps

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"Every question and every statement feels like a trap. A path laid out where at the end your partner “proves” a point. For example, instead of asking “Do you want to have dinner with me?” The question is phrased as “Would you rather be glued to your laptop or have dinner with me?”. By any chance, if you answer anything other than what your partner is expecting, it becomes a generalized war like “You always…” or “You never….” However, it’s an entirely different result if the roles are reversed."

My way or my way?

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Controlling behavior can grow into something very ugly. Just because you’re a couple, doesn’t mean you need to agree with everything your partner says. It doesn’t mean you love them any less just because you have a different point of view. A supportive partner would respect what you have to say if they don’t agree with it. As much as everybody wants to be two peas in a pod, you’re still very different peas and that’s okay.

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