What is a dating 'ick' and how is it different from a red flag?

By now we’re all pretty familiar with what red and green flags are. Red flags typically refer to the warning signs or behaviours exhibited by the person that you’re dating or your partner that indicate potential problems or concerns. Whereas, green flags are positive indicators or behaviours that suggest a healthy and promising relationship. But what about dating ‘icks’? 

While the term has been circulating over the internet often, many still confuse an ick with a red flag. So, what’s the big difference?

An Ick vs A Red Flag

Well, for the unacquainted, a dating ‘ick’ basically refers to a feeling of discomfort or aversion towards the behaviour, mannerisms, or quirks of the person that you’re dating. Some common examples of a dating ick include poor hygiene or grooming habits, overbearing or clingy behaviour, lack of ambition or drive, or even their obsession with their online image on social media. 

While a dating ick might cause discomfort or annoyance, it may not necessarily impact the overall health or viability of the relationship. These icks could be something that can be overlooked or worked through with communication and understanding. However, in contrast, red flags often require lots of careful consideration and may signal some fundamental issues that need to be addressed or may even lead to the end of the relationship.

Top icks in SG and Asia Pacific 

According to a recent survey by GWI, approximately 1 in 3 single individuals in the Asia Pacific region are actively dating, with frequencies ranging from at least once a month (24%) to more than once a week (4%). However, navigating the dating scene comes with its challenges, as highlighted by the top reported dating icks in the region. Poor manners top the list, with 43% of respondents citing this behaviour as a major turn-off, followed closely by individuals who predominantly talk about themselves (34%). Additionally, slow replies were identified as a significant annoyance by 32% of survey participants. 

When it comes to dating, the GWI survey has also noted that there are some common dating preferences and deal-breakers encountered by singles in the Asia Pacific. For instance, singles navigating the dating scene in the region exhibit a heightened sensitivity towards certain factors including their potential partner's lack of social media presence, suggesting a desire for digital connectivity and engagement. Additionally, a difference in music taste emerges as a significant concern, with daters being 22% more likely to find it off-putting. This highlights the importance of shared cultural interests and lifestyle compatibility in the region's dating landscape. Furthermore, slow replies are another notable turn-off, with daters being 18% more likely to be dissuaded by delays in communication. These insights underscore the nuances and preferences inherent in the dating dynamics of the Asia Pacific, emphasizing the need for individuals to be mindful of cultural and social expectations as they seek meaningful connections in the dating world. 

Should a dating ick be a cause of concern when dating someone? 

In summary, whether an ick should raise concerns in dating is highly dependent on its frequency, severity, and impact on the relationship. Occasional, minor icks are normal and may not warrant alarm, but consistent discomfort or repulsion towards a partner's behaviour could signal deeper compatibility issues. Communication is key; discussing feelings openly can lead to mutual understanding and potential resolution. Evaluating whether the ick aligns with one's values and long-term compatibility is crucial, as is trusting instincts and boundaries. Sometimes, encountering an ick prompts personal growth and self-reflection. But ultimately, the significance of an ick depends on its effect on overall happiness and well-being in the relationship.