Business Of Love: The couple who counsels other couples together

Having healed from their own lived experiences of abuse, anxiety, conflict, and trauma, Kester Tay, a former diplomat, and Kavitha Shekar, formerly in healthcare, utilise their diverse experiences to guide individuals and couples through the complexities of relationships. Intracresco, which means inner growth in Latin, extends beyond couples therapy – the couple also treat other mental health related issues such as trauma and anxiety. While therapy sessions are conducted online for now, they are in the process of renovating their clinic, with plans to open later this year.

How did the two of you meet and venture into the field of therapy?

Kester: As we both found inner joy through meditation, we felt called to share the practice to help others. We met in 2019, while volunteering at a meditation centre in Singapore. We became friends and found that we had similar interests in the helping field.

Kavitha: That year, I founded Intracresco as a wellness company with initial offerings of yoga and meditation classes. In late 2019, I left an unsafe marriage to stay in a shelter home with my then three-year-old son, eventually getting a divorce in 2020. Kester supported me throughout, and he later joined Intracresco. This was an intense period where our relationship brought out traumas from our past. This led us on a search to deeply understand the root causes of human suffering, and train in various therapy and counselling methods to heal ourselves and our relationship.

Did your personal struggles influence your decision to study therapy?

Kester: The pain Kavitha felt in her previous marriage, and the past traumas it brought out, led her to seek therapy, finding limited understanding from available counsellors. Frustrated with the lack of solutions, she decided to study therapy to heal herself. For myself, I have a background in diplomacy, and have always felt a calling to meaningful work. I started studying various therapy modalities and meditation, eventually becoming a meditation teacher and therapist.

Kavitha: Our mission at Intracresco is to empower people to live full and authentic lives by understanding oneself. We realised that yoga and meditation classes were not sufficient to realise this goal, as they did not address the root causes of people’s mental and emotional issues. Thus, we decided to shift to offering individual and couple therapy, which brought more profound and longer-term changes in people.

How does a couples therapy session work at Intracresco? Do you both hold the session together as a couple?

Kavitha: Yes, we hold the sessions together as a couple. Our sessions are unique, as we emphasise a mix of individual and couple care in couples therapy. We often delve into individual issues before bringing the couple back together for therapy. This approach involves understanding the root of conflicts, often related to childhood upbringing or personal insecurities.

This is also why we prefer longer therapy sessions of three hours for couples therapy. Traditional session lengths often fall short in allowing individuals to fully uncover their patterns, make sense of them, and arrive at viable solutions.

How do you balance your roles as therapists and a couple?

Kavitha: Our work as therapists and as a couple is intertwined. We share our experiences, vulnerabilities and learnings openly, whether in professional or personal matters.

When it comes to handling disagreements or differing professional opinions, open communication is key. I share my own pain and seek support when needed. We acknowledge when our capacity to support each other may be limited, and agree to take individual time before coming back together to address the issues.

Has your work as therapists influenced your personal growth and understanding of yourselves?

Kester: We believe it's the other way around. Our personal journeys have influenced our work as therapists. By addressing our own traumas and insecurities, we bring authenticity and depth to our therapeutic practices. Personal growth has been foundational to our effectiveness as therapists.

In a profession that deals with the complexities of relationships, how do you support each other emotionally and professionally?

Kester: Today, after two years of marriage, although there are moments of trigger, we work better as a team to navigate each challenge with understanding. We see each challenge as an invitation for us to introspect and grow as individuals. Our constant efforts to improve ourselves and our relationship remains critical to our effectiveness as therapists.

Kavitha: As we heal, we come to accept our past and therefore accept ourselves more. As we accept ourselves more, we also accept each other more. This is what we advocate as the foundation of an authentic and meaningful life.

PHOTOGRAPHY Clement Goh
ART DIRECTION Adeline Eng
HAIR FOR KESTER Aung Apichai, using Kevin Murphy
GROOMING FOR KESTER Aaron Ng, using YSL Beauty