Ideas & Advice

What to do if you secretly hate your engagement ring

You've got your dream man, he's put a ring on it, and you're in seventh heaven... except for one not-so-tiny detail. What's a bride-to-be to do if she hates her engagement ring?

Image: 123rf/Prasit Rodphan

If you're of the belief that your husband-to-be should surprise you when the time comes for him to pop the question, there's a 50-50 chance that you may not like your sparkler as much as you should.

When the time comes, here're a few things you can do:

1. Keep calm

Once he's opened the all-important box, maintain an expression of excitement, and never ever let him see your disappointment.

He's spent all that time and effort planning for the perfect proposal, and the last thing you want to do, is mar it with bad memories by not appreciating it.

2. Take time to think about it

Take a few weeks to think about, while wearing the ring (of course).

This will give you time to see if you're able to grow to love the design or not. Plus, you should really find out the reason behind his choice.

You never know: there might be a sweet story behind the ring, and you may grow to love it better.

3. Leave it

Even if the design's not "you", the ring comes with a sentimental value. Exchanging it for another may defeat its purpose, and you may grow to love it for what it means.

Plus, there are always other ways to dress it up (pairing it with your wedding ring may make all the difference, you know).

4. Exchange, or make slight amendments to it

If by the end of those few weeks, you still can't see yourself wearing it, decide what you dislike about it, and break the news gently. The right time matters, too.

If you're really uncomfortable with the look and feel of the ring, it may be better for you to change the design (slightly or to an entirely new one), as you'll be wearing it for life, and don't want to be begrudging (we really hope not) your fiance for not knowing your style better.

You can approach it by praising the elements you liked, then add a few suggestions on how your ring might look better, in your opinion. After all, he's spent time, money, and effort searching for (what he thinks is) the perfect ring for you, so tread with care.

I personally wouldn't recommend you sell the ring, or change the design entirely. If it's a simple one, you can choose to change the band, or the setting of the ring.

Lastly, if you're worried, there are ways to getting your boyfriend to pick the "right ring". Simply direct him to our link on tips to picking the right bling without you knowing, or tips to selecting the right engagement and wedding bands. Good luck!