You never thought you would be one of those couples who quarrel over their wedding, but here you both are, with disagreements week in and week out. Well, you aren’t alone.
Most of the time, it’s just the stress and anxiety of planning such a huge event that gets the best of us. This inevitably leads to quarrels, and its a common issue for couples planning their wedding.
Here are 5 ways you can manage your wedding planning journey and, at the end of the day, still be lovingly committed to your relationship.
1. Be clear about your responsibilities and roles
One of the most common grouse brides-to-be have is how their partner don't seem to care about the wedding. They end up having to do the bulk of the research, planning and decision making without receiving much feedback from their partner.
Before this happens, it is best to discuss how you want to approach your wedding prep journey.
You can either split the responsibilities between the both of you according to your strengths/interests, or have someone do the initial research before coming together to narrow down the choices.
There are many ways to go about it. What’s important is that you play to each of your strengths and you keep your communication clear and open.
While this may be difficult at the beginning, once you get settled into a system you’re both comfortable with, how you deal with each big decision will soon be made easier over time.
Or, you could start attending a pre-wedding counselling course in preparation for both your wedding and marriage.
2. Go on dates and stop talking about the wedding
Take time out to go on dates. And if you can, avoid talk of anything wedding related. (We mean it.)
Doing things that you both enjoy as a couple will definitely help to recharge you. It’s also a reminder of how your relationship should be the centre of your attention, and not the wedding.
Talking about something inexhaustibly will cause other facets of your relationship to be neglected. The last thing you’d want is associating time spent together as just wedding planning and wedding talk!
Even if you’ve been together for a gazillion years, never take quality bonding time for granted. You can even have dates right at home with these 8 FUN DATE IDEAS FOR HOMEBODY COUPLES.
3. Set a non-negotiable rule and stick to it no matter
Decide on the one thing you can never compromise on. This could be anything really, as long as its important to you, and its something you want to live by.
Maybe you’re quarrelling over your guest lists.
You can’t decide if you should try accommodate three more tables of your parents’ relatives or stick to your budget of a certain number of tables.
You would prefer to keep your parents happy, but you know working around these extra tables mean either taking guests off from your own list of friends, or paying more for the banquet.
At this juncture, it is always good to look back at that non-negotiable rule.
If you’ve set your mind to hold a banquet to honour your parents and their wishes, then you’ll have to work out a way to accommodate those extra guests no matter what.
In the case that you’ve made a firm decision to stick to your wedding budget, then you’ll have to either let your parents know that you can’t accommodate those extra tables, or you’ll need to remove some of your own guests from the list.
See also: 10 WAYS TO MANAGE YOUR GUEST LIST
4. Avoid overwhelming your partner
Before you bombard your partner with another 12 links on customisable wedding favours, a better way could be sharing your findings in a shared document that has been neatly formatted.
On top of everything else that’s ongoing, you shouldn’t be stressing them out in having to look through every link to catch up with you right there and then.
Allow them to get back to you in good time about the vendors so that you can have a smooth-sailing discussion on each of your preference.
5. When you’re feeling mad, touch your ring
If you’re just feeling tired of everything that is required of you, and you're tired of dealing with the issues in a responsible and logical manner, just take a deep breath and touch your ring.
Not only does it serve as a reminder of the promise you are to make to each other for life, it is also as ridiculous as it sounds. It is this incomprehensible action that might dispel the tension and anger in the air.