Unsurprisingly, most of us are not used to sharing our intimate emotions and thoughts to a large crowd, so the exchange of your wedding vows can be a rather nerve-wracking experience. Even professional speakers and actors take years to master public speaking.

Once you are able to overcome your nervousness however, your vows are usually one of the few moments you’ll come to remember long after your big day. The weight and importance of your lifelong promise, spoken aloud on such an occasion in front of your loved ones, can be a very touching and emotional one.

For all of you shy brides and grooms-to be, we have a few practical expert tips that will help prepare you for the magnitude and importance of such a moment, and make your vow exchange a precious memory that you can hold close to your heart.

Sweaty palms and butterflies in your tummy be gone!

Keep your breathing under control

Take a full and deep breath before speaking, form the words with the outgoing breath, and make sure you hear them.

Breathing deeply is a form of relaxation, and will help in calming you down. If you feel like you’re about to panic, just pause, and take a deep breath before continuing. It breaks the cycle of feeling out of control.

Focus on the person you are speaking to

Be conscious of placing your focus on the person you are speaking to, because putting the focus outside yourself will help you be less self-conscious. After all, self-awareness can be rather painful.


Our voice reflects how we are physically and our facial muscles affect the sound of our voice. When we smile, we actually sound more vibrant and alive. While this is a serious occasion, it is not a sombre one!

Practice as soon as you can

Demystifying the act of public speaking will make it easier to overcome on the day of.

Just like how we attempt a sport or skill for the first time, actually doing it will dispel your previous notion of how difficult it is. Even if it turns out to be tougher than you thought, at least you know how it feels like now, and can practice accordingly from there.  

  1. Start off with saying your name aloud – something most of us probably find odd. When you can get used to hearing yourself say your name, you can move on to your vows. Say them louder then you normally speak.
  2. Then, you can try singing them. This will encourage you in playing around with the words. When you return to speaking the words, you’ll find that they will be uttered more firmly and have more colour.
  3. Lastly, whisper your vows. Be aware of how the air define the words. And when you return to speaking, because you have employed more muscularity in whispering them, those words will sound fuller and the consonants sharper.

Enjoy and savour the moment

It is a privilege to have someone bound their love to you, and to share with all your loved ones this moment of commitment to each other.

In some cultures, it is believed that once something is said, it remains out there forever. Remember this as you commit to one another. It is a wonderful sentiment to hold on to.

Unsure of how to write your vows? Take a note from these sweet celebrities: YOGA LIN TO JESSECA LIU: 11 ROMANTIC QUOTES OR VOWS FROM ASIAN CELEBRITIES