A good sex life takes time and effort to maintain. It won’t always be easy — our busy lives are taxing and often leave us tired and devoid of the imagination and motivation required to keep up the pace. Having good sex doesn't necessarily mean spending hours and hours of frolicking or adding a few toys into the mix, it can be as simple as doing something a little different just for a change. Here are nine ways for having better sex…  

 

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#1 Tell him what turns you on

Research suggests that better communication is key to better sex, and no, we don't necessarily mean dirty talk. Communicating what you like, and what you don't like can be instructional and informative as you get to know each other's bodies. If he's doing something you like, say so rather than relying on ambiguous gestures or noises. And.never.fake.it. 

 

#2 Praise your partner

In a 2016 study published in the Journal of Sex Research, researchers analysed answers from 39,000 heterosexual couples that were married or cohabiting for over three years. Sexual satisfaction reported to be higher among the couples who revealed that they gave each other positive affirmation during sex and were open enough about embarrassing moments during sex to joke about them and move on. 

 

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#3 Be spontaneous

Even great sex can start to feel monotonous over time if it's more or less the same old routine. Try to mix things up. Try role-playing... take a bath together. Be inventive, have fun. 

See also: 7 TIPS TO NOT GET INTO AN OLD-MARRIED COUPLE ROUTINE

 

#4 Go for morning or afternoon sex

Get a morning quickie in. Set the alarm 30 minutes before your usual time and see what happens. Men's testosterone levels peak in the morning so you might be pleasantly surprised... Another (awesome) alternative would be to have afternoon sex on weekends. Well, you've got a bed and nothing to do before dinner at night... Interestingly enough, women tend to ovulate in the afternoon, meaning that the optimal hormone level for female sexual desire happens at the time.

 

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#5 Think of foreplay 

Foreplay should start long even before sex even begins. Make sure to be attentive to your partner. Small gestures and nice comments are significant to setting the right mood and getting you hot for each other. 

 

#5 Keep moving

Exercise improves circulation in the body, and that includes the blood flow to your genital area, consequently increasing desire and lifting your mood.

 

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#7 Dirty talking

Talking about sex stimulates more than our ears. What kind of talk? Dirty, praising and instructive are great starts. A woman's words can make a guy feel potent. 

See also: DON'T LET THESE 8 COMMON SEX MYTHS DAMPEN YOUR MARRIAGE & SEX LIFE

 

#8 Other than the bed

Having a change of scenery can add an exciting, surprising rush. And there is no limit to the number of ways to have sex, so you can use your imagination and come up with as many weird and wonderful inventions as you desire. Simply changing locations can dramatically change the position, so consider this too (for example, on top of the washing machine, on a bench, beanbag or table). 

 

#9 Have fantasies

Men want to share their fantasies but worry their wives will shame or judge them. Want to open yourself to these possibilities? Try making a game of it. If you're both comfortable, give it a shot. 

This article was originally published in The Singapore Women's Weekly.

See also: 6 TIPS TO GOOD SEX THAT THIS SEXOLOGIST WANTS YOU TO  KNOW