Ideas & Advice

Drop these bad relationship patterns before getting married!

If you want a strong foundation for your marriage, here are some bad relationship habits and patterns that should be dealt with before you say ‘I do’.

1. Expecting your partner to be a mind-reader

Stop expecting your partner to know what you want. 

While it’s nice when your partner anticipates your needs, expecting them to know your every wish and whim will only leave both of you frustrated.

State what you’d prefer and even if you don’t get the reply you’re looking for, it’s on you to ask and make your needs clear.


2. Trying to stir up feelings of jealousy

Making your partner jealous as a way to get their attention or as punishment, threatens the sanctity of your relationship which should be rooted in love.

Instead of resorting to this, you should talk it out and let them know of your frustration.


3. Constantly questioning if they love you

No one likes their ‘I love yous’ to be insincere. Asking your partner if they love you all the time will not only make you seem insecure,  it will cause the expression to be something of a tiresome chore to your partner instead of one that’s said with genuine love and spontaneity.

If your partner isn’t the type that’s comfortable with this sort of affection, you can discuss about it but don’t keep asking for it or questioning it. 


4. Staying in a routine

Your weekend dates now consist of staying in and watching TV, going for dinner at the hawker nearby or watching a movie in the neighbourhood mall. Or once in a while, you might have a staycation or a quick trip to BKK.

To keep the excitement and passion in a relationship however, it is best to be open to new experiences, adventures, or hobbies together.

Stepping out of your comfort zone and placing yourselves in new situations will create new memories that you’ll share, and bring out sides of you that your partner might not have seen.



5. Always blaming it on your partner

Many couples have the tendency to get defensive and blame their partner for their own mistakes or oversights – after all, no one wants to be the bad guy.

However when this becomes a habit, they become focused on how they can remove the blame on themselves, and shift it to their partner instead.

As a result, couples end up working against each other.

Instead of doing this, taking responsibility and owning up to your actions will help in strengthening your relationship with trust and maturity.


6. Threatening to leave when things aren't going your way

When you’ve committed to a lifelong union, threatening to leave when things aren’t going your way is one of the last thing you should do.

There are exceptions of course; domestic abuse etc, but if you’ve made a promise to stay ‘for better or for worse’, then threatening your partner with divorce is a lousy way out of your issues.