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1. Should we have a baby?
If you haven’t already talked about it, it’s time to. Having children is a lifetime commitment that requires a lot of responsibility and changes to your current lifestyle. Not only should you discuss whether you actually want kids, you should also be on the same page when it comes to the general timeline for when you want to start your family.
2. The future mother-in-law wants the keys to our apartment!
Whether she wants the keys to your apartment or he wants to move in, parent-in-law issues can be tricky to manage, and should be handled tactfully to avoid future discontentment and conflict. The best case scenario is really to let your spouse-to-be know how you feel, and for him/her to gently tell them no. Don’t be pressured into giving in if you aren’t comfortable with it – it is your home after all. Plus, putting your foot down earlier on is better than caving in and getting resentful afterwards.
See also: Is your mother-in-law driving you crazy? Here’s how to cope
3. He/She’s spending more than I’m okay with!
Be it for the wedding itself or for your future home, you’ll want to set a budget, how you want to split it, and stick to it as much as you can. Do you also want to have a separate or joint account? How should you be splitting the bills?
4. Your arguments get out of hand
Arguments aren’t necessarily bad but it’s all about fighting fair. If you’re hurling nasty insults, attacking each other’s character, or basically “losing it”, you don’t want to bring that into your marriage. Set the ground rules for arguments – if you’ve resorted to low blows or said something you regret, both of you should learn from it and avoid repeating it in future arguments. Violence, of course, is a big no-no. If your partner gets physically aggressive, you should be re-evaluating your relationship, or even seeking help.
See also: Got into an argument? Don’t do these 7 things
5. He doesn’t understand where I’m coming from
There’s no right or wrong about your lifestyle choices or goals. But it’s best to lay out your hopes, goals, personal values and even relationship dealbreakers on the table – Different interests are one thing, but different perspectives on life and beliefs can impact your relationship and not necessarily in a good way. By understanding your partner’s personal values, it also helps you to understand his/her reaction to particular issues, which makes it easier to manage differences.