From The Straits Times    |
 

Ushering in the new year with a long lazy weekend, making plans for a big big 2016 #thepaperbunny #flatlay

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Be positive
It’s very easy to get stressed and fall into a bad funk while planning for what is supposed to be the happiest day of your life. Remember that the journey matters just as much as the ‘destination’. Don’t let the stress of your wedding prep drag you into negative territory. Be mindful of what’s happening around you and always try to remain positive in all your interactions with your partner, family and wedding vendors. See how you can make your wedding prep process a stress-free and enjoyable one here.

At the end of the day, there will be unexpected problems and issues that are beyond your control. So if you can accept this, and have an open mind, your journey can be a happy experience for both of you.

Get fit, healthy and toned 
Every bride wants to look their best for the wedding and some have the misguided notion that looking good means losing as much weight as possible. I have come across brides-to-be embarking on crash diets just so that they could fit into a gown that’s two sizes smaller than their usual size.  

It’s much more important to be fit and healthy than skinny and tired looking.  The reality of losing a lot of weight is that your skin loses its luster and elasticity, and you will not be in peak fitness condition to face the gruelling activities of your big day.

My advice: Get toned (so that your limbs are firm and leaner) instead of losing too much weight. Lose weight naturally by eating less of the four ‘whites’ – sugar, bread, rice and anything with flour – and stock up- on energy rich food. Stick to reasonable diet that lets you lose a few pounds in the right areas. Look healthy and happy! See our tips on getting toned here.

Don’t bust your budget
Every bride wants the wedding of their dreams and some are willing to bust their budget just to get that dream realised. If you can afford it, go for it; but my advice is to work out a reasonable budget with your fiancee and stick to it no matter how tempting it is to spend more.

Learn to prioritise and compromise. There will be some important aspects of your wedding that you should spend on (a good photographer, a great dinner venue) and some that you can afford to cut back on. It is never a good idea to get into debt at the start of your married life. See the budget mistakes to avoid, plus budget tips from real brides!

Get organised
Just because your wedding is still months (or years) away, that’s not a good reason not to get organised early. I always advise brides to get organised and start their wedding prep at least eight months before the big day. They should be able to confirm 80 per cent of their wedding plans three months before the big day. This will give them a sufficient time period to deal with last minute issues and problems that will inevitably crop up. Getting organised will also reduce the stress if everything is resolved and confirmed early. See other planning mistakes to avoid, here.

You can start with research and checking out the various wedding vendors you want to work with at the beginning. Create folders, get a timeline with deadlines going and start delegating tasks to your helpers and bridal party. 

Be decisive
You should be able to change your mind on aspects of your wedding – but don’t do it at the last minute or when most of the work has been done. Not only is it unprofessional, it also disrupts all the planning and work that has been done so far.

You should be clear about what you want from the start and stick to the decision once you’re certain.  But if the wedding is still a few months away and you suddenly decided that an all-white palette for your wedding decor is too boring, you should be able to change the colour theme or concept if you give your vendor enough time.  But you may have to pay more for the change if it entails more costs and work. 

Just remember: Change is possible but don’t do it at the last minute and be prepared to pay for more.

Learn to trust
Bridezillas tend to micro-manage ever single detail and in the process they get stressed out, and create tension with the people they are working with; the entire experience ends up being a bad one. If you’ve done your research well and confirmed a vendor you’re happy with, learn to trust that they will deliver what they promise. Then you can proceed to deal with other items on your to-do list. Just ensure the vendor gives you regular updates close to the big day.

The same goes for your helpers and bridal party: once you’ve discussed and delegated tasks to them, let them do the work for you and avoid micro-managing them.  These are people who are volunteering their personal time to help you with your planning – so you should be appreciative of their efforts. If you’re really particular about some items, do it yourself.  In that way you can manage your own expectations.

Be social media savvy
Online apps and social media will help greatly with your wedding prep. Used wisely and selectively, social media can help you keep track of your RSVP and wedding prep updates

But be careful of using your social media accounts to list every single detail of your preparation progress, the ups and downs of planning for your big day or as an outlet for all your frustrations and stress. Your friends don’t really want to know every single detail, or get involved in the dramas of your life as you prepare for your big day. See the statuses you should not be posting on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, here.