Sheila Sim returns to the spotlight

When the opportunity to audition for Emerald Hill – The Little Nyonya Story arose, Sheila Sim hesitated. For the past three years, she had been a stay-at-home mum, intentionally stepping away from the spotlight to raise her two young daughters.

Recounting the story now from Little Rogue Coffee – a quiet, charming little nook in Tiong Bahru, where she resides – Sheila admits with a wry smile that she “found so many reasons” not to audition. What if the schedule was intense? What if she had to go to Malaysia for filming? Would she be able to get help with childcare at home?

And, if she was being honest, the logistics weren’t the real issue here.

“I didn’t feel confident. I haven’t acted in a long time, and it’s a big production – a lot of people will be watching it. All the more I cannot fail,” she emphasises.

The response from the drama’s producer was simple: Actors only get better by trying. It was a timely reminder.

“I sat with that for two days,” she recalls. “Part of me knew that I had to step out of my comfort zone, but there was also a part of me that was so afraid.”

There’s something to be said about how matrescence triggers a tectonic shift in self-worth and identity. For Sheila, it manifested as an inner voice that had suddenly become very self-limiting.

“I started to believe that I couldn’t do a lot of things, which was very new to me. That was not a version of myself that I know,” the 41-year-old muses.

This was an unexpected development for Sheila, who was scouted at 16 and, soon after, made the bold choice to drop out of polytechnic to model full-time. Her career in fashion brought her Hong Kong, Tokyo, Milan and Paris, cities that she had to navigate solo as a young Asian woman, sans Google maps. She’d worked with the likes of Chanel, Fendi, Dior and SK-II. She had never second-guessed herself, nor baulked at the idea of travelling for work – until then.

But like many mothers returning to work, Sheila soon realised that the key was to ease back in. Her turn as Zhang Yin Niang may have been a modest role in Mediacorp’s blockbuster of the year, but it proved pivotal. It showed her that she could, in fact, carve out space for career and family simultaneously.

“That gave me the confidence to continue [working],” she says, noting that she might not have navigated the juggling act – or the mum guilt – as gracefully if her first role back had been more demanding.

Booked and busy

Today, the mother of two has a good momentum going. Her next on-screen appearance will be in The Leftovers, a dystopian crime drama by Mediacorp, set to premiere next October. She’s also filming Brighter Days, another upcoming Mediacorp production starring Romeo Tan and Felicia Chin, which will keep her busy until next June.

Alongside her filming schedule, she’s also pursuing a diploma in psychotherapy and counselling – her third credential in the field of positive psychology.

Which begs the question: How does a model turned actor find her way into the realm of mental wellness?

To answer that, we first have to turn back the clock. Sheila’s childhood was marked by a profound loss: Her brother died of leukaemia after a two-year battle, when she was nine. She wasn’t at the hospital to say her final goodbye, a regret that still sits heavy with her.

Her childhood was also far from idyllic. Her parents fought often and divorced when she was 12. Custody went to her father, who later remarried, and it took time for Sheila to accept her stepmother.

And while being scouted might sound like the stuff of teenage dreams, the modelling world greeted her with a harsh reality. Not long after signing, her agent told her she was “too fat” and urged her to lose weight. For two weeks, she subsisted on a single green apple a day, until she fainted from undernourishment.

Still, the former model says the most difficult chapter of her life came later, in her 20s.

“It was the peak of my career. It was also the time when I was in the most dramatic relationship I’ve ever had. I was at the most insecure point of my life,” she recalls with candour. She describes herself then as deeply emotionally dysregulated, constantly questioning why her achievements didn’t match how she felt inside.

“I analysed it to no end, and I had no answer. In the end, I decided to seek professional help,” she says.

Session by session, she found herself untangling long-buried knots, learning to move through challenges with more clarity. That experience, quietly transformative, also sparked her curiosity about psychology.

At 35, and five years into her acting career, Sheila found herself pondering what the next chapter of her life would look like.

“It was a very organic progression from modelling to acting,” Sheila says of her first career pivot. “I was very lucky to be given very heavy roles, so I just went with the flow.

“But at some point, I felt like it wasn’t something I wanted to grow old with. Then, what’s next?”

A purposeful life

That question led her to The School of Positive Psychology, where she earned a diploma in Positive Psychology in 2021. She followed that up with another diploma in Coaching Psychology earlier this year, which saw her clocking 60 hours of coaching as part of the process.

Leveraging her social media following (over 180K on Instagram), Sheila put out an open invitation to book a session with her. Modes of payment accepted? They ranged from buying her a drink, to making a donation to The Straits Times School Pocket Money Fund or the Ministry of Education’s Financial Assistance Scheme. Everything was pay-as-you-wish.

The decision to keep the barrier to entry low was intentional. She wanted her sessions to be accessible, and a good portion of those who responded turned out to be people who have never done coaching or therapy before.

“Most of the time, the concern was financial. They weren’t sure if this was suitable for them, and they didn’t want to have to pay to find out,” she observes. It was her first time practising positive psychology coaching beyond a classroom setting, and she found the experience very rewarding.

“I’m supposed to be helping my clients, but they have helped me too. It’s a two-way street, and I’ve really enjoyed all those sessions,” she adds.

For the uninitiated, positive psychology takes a different approach from traditional psychology; instead of fixing what’s broken, the study focuses on the strengths, habits and environments that help people thrive.

“It’s about maximising the potential and happiness of a person. That sounded great to me,” Sheila explains. “I didn’t know what I wanted to do with this, it was purely for self-development.”

In hindsight, Sheila says it was almost serendipitous that she began studying positive psychology just before she became pregnant with her first daughter, Layla, who is now 5.

“It equipped me with a lot of skills and knowledge on how to handle parenthood,” she reflects. And true to form, Sheila is already eyeing her next area of study: child psychology.

“I really hope that my existence can make the world a better place,” she says. “The more I’m going into coaching and psychology, the more I hope I can contribute.”

Heart-to-heart

As our interview wraps up, I expected us to part ways. After all, we both have to pick up our kids from preschool in about an hour’s time.

However, upon learning that my son loves chiffon cakes, Sheila walks me to Cheng’s @ 27, a beloved Tiong Bahru fixture since 1989. Once a family-run restaurant, it has now evolved into a confectionery that is well-known among residents for its chiffon cakes and artisan kaya.

“They’re really good!” she insists (for the record, she’s absolutely right) as I pick up two slices from a seemingly unmanned storefront. Earlier, she had also sent me a link to an Airbnb she stayed at while visiting Legoland Malaysia with her family.

“There’s a slide in the house!” she says, eyes lighting up. I joke about how having children has drastically changed our vacation prerequisites, prompting her to burst into laughter.

While waiting for my Grab ride, our conversation drifts to the realities of mum life – from baby-led weaning to the constant overstimulation. I mention that my children are younger than hers, but with a similar two-and-a-half-year age gap.

“It’ll get easier in about two years,” she assures me, her voice gentle yet certain. Coming from anyone else, I’d have rolled my eyes. But Sheila has an uncanny ability to connect – instantly and genuinely – never mind that we just met two hours ago.

And maybe that’s her real superpower – both on screen and in the quiet work she does off it.

PHOTOGRAPHY Joel Low, assisted by Eddie Teo
CREATIVE DIRECTION & STYLING Lena Kamarudin, assisted by Helaine Ercia
ART DIRECTION Ray Ticsay
MAKEUP Clarence Lee, using Cle de Peau Beaute
HAIR Zhou Aiyi
LOCATION Presidential Suite at The Laurus, a Luxury Collection Resort in Resorts World Sentosa