Are women in Singapore exhausted by dating apps? They share tales of ghosting, catfishing, and finding love

It’s not looking good for the dating scene in Singapore, or at least, that’s what the majority of people seem to be saying, both in real life and in TikTok comment sections. With seemingly fewer opportunities for a Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet, it’s no surprise that more people are turning to dating apps to find love.

But through the awkward first dates, constant ghosting, catfishing, lovebombing and breadcrumbing, is it actually possible to find love with just a swipe? We’ve gathered a platter of horror and success stories from Singaporean women who have made their way through the dating scene, emerging with either trauma or a boyfriend.

The horror stories

It was Hungry Ghost Month so he became a ghost too

“I was dating this guy for three months, and I really liked him, but there were a few red flags in the things he’d say, like how he’d only date “the best out of the friend group”. But I decided to ignore them because we had chemistry, and our conversations were never boring.

On the day he asked me to be his girlfriend, we got intimate, and he said he’d ask me out properly once he came back from his business trip to Japan.

Well, guess what? He never texted. My mind started making up all sorts of crazy scenarios, and I was even worried something had happened to him. It didn’t even cross my mind that I was being ghosted.

It wasn’t until I opened Hinge again to stalk his profile that I realised he’d updated it with new pictures, ones that I had taken of him. Needless to say, I was beyond devastated. I drunk-texted him once because I just couldn’t believe he had made all those promises, only to disappear. He didn’t reply to that either.

I deleted the app right after.”

Thank you, next

“We went on a first date, but I didn’t really feel a connection between us, so I told him I’d rather just be friends. After reading my text, he didn’t even reply — just left me on read. Fine by me; people ghost all the time.

Then, I coincidentally met him again at a mutual friend’s housewarming. We started talking again and actually hit it off, although the alcohol might have been doing some of the work.

But things got super uncomfortable for me when he kept trying to kiss me throughout the night, and I kept pushing him away. This was when the alarm bells started blaring in my head — what kind of man is so comfortable with all this PDA in front of an audience?

Nonetheless, he took this as a sign that I wasn’t interested and even got mad at me when I refused to kiss him. Then, another girl in the group casually mentioned that her body count was 16 — and just like that, he immediately gave her all his attention instead.

The switch-up was so fast I genuinely didn’t know what to do with myself. One minute he was trying to kiss me all night, and the next, he had apparently found a new target. I was flabbergasted. Appalled, even.

Anyway, he ended up leaving with her that night, and he even removed me from all his social media platforms. Like, wow. I knew dating apps had their fair share of rotten apples, but this guy really takes the cake.”

Laundry loser

“I was in a two-year relationship with a man I met on Hinge. At first, he seemed perfect. He was sweet, affectionate, constantly showering me with flowers and somehow fluent in all five love languages.

Then he got comfortable. Whenever I stayed over, he’d expect me to do the laundry. Not just his and mine, but his entire family’s. I was doing laundry for a family of seven.

When I complained, he told me it was only fair since I was staying at his place. I eventually brought it up with his mother, only for her to tell me, “Since you’ll be married soon, might as well start doing housewife chores early.”

I stayed because I loved him and couldn’t bear to see two years go down the drain. Yet ironically, it was exactly what happened.

A friend sent me a screenshot of his new Hinge profile. He was back on the app, while we were still together.”

The success stories that will make you believe in love

Love at first sight

“We met when we were just 18; old enough to legally join OkCupid, apparently, and just in time to match with each other.

Call it divine timing or destiny, but we were each other’s first and only match who actually met in real life.

A few dates turned into a relationship, and five years later, we’re still going strong. It’s been a steady, happy relationship, and we’ve barely had any big fights along the way.

What started as a silly little curiosity about dating apps ended up introducing me to the love of my life.”

Friends to lovers

“I had just gotten out of a super toxic relationship, so I downloaded Hinge simply to meet new people. Getting into anything serious wasn’t even on my mind.

I met more than 10 people, but I never felt the same kind of connection I’d had with my ex. So I either ghosted them or told them I’d rather stay friends. Thinking back, I was quite the villain, but what’s done is done. Sue me.

Then I met my current boyfriend. We talked for about two months while he was overseas on exchange, and if we could keep a conversation going for that long online, I figured we’d probably hit it off in real life. And we did.

We met as friends a few times for simple meals and gym sessions before he officially asked me out. By our fifth date, I was already, highkey, very much in love with him.

I came into the relationship carrying plenty of emotional baggage from my previous one, but he was willing to sit down, talk through it all with me and love me through it anyway.

I know there are plenty of trashy men on dating apps — I’ve met my fair share. But looking back, all those failed dates eventually led me to him, so I’d say it was worth it.

Ladies, here’s a word of advice: Sometimes, things don’t work out because the universe has something better in store for you.”

From swiping to marriage

“I married my Coffee Meets Bagel match. When we first met, I’m not going to lie — I didn’t feel an instant connection. In fact, it felt completely different from how I’d felt with my exes. Later, I realised that was exactly what I wanted.

My previous relationships were always intense, with a million things happening at once. But with him, everything felt stable and calm. He brought a sense of comfort to my chaos, and over time, I realised that was what I needed — not someone who would constantly keep me guessing or play games with me.

I started reciprocating, we began seeing more of each other, and everything just unfolded naturally from there.

I might have met him on a dating app, but this relationship ended up feeling more fulfilling than any I’d had before.

And now, I can call him my husband.”