How to honour your grandparents at your wedding

Real couple Mary-Ann Soh and Simon Lim included their family and friends in their modern pre-wedding photoshoot. Click here for more details on their wedding.

Have them be a part of the ceremony

There are several ways to do this, including having them walk down the aisle before you (not unlike one of the suggestions we gave for your parents), asking them to do one of the readings, or asking them to lead everyone in a prayer before the ceremony or reception (if they’re religious). You can even invite them to be a part of your wedding party, like this bride did! The result? An adorable sentiment, which made for wonderfully touching pictures.

Read their favourite stories

Whether it’s a special verse, poem, or a story they told you while you were growing up, you can include them in your readings, or as part of your wedding programme. Don’t forget to have your readings and programmes done in their mother tongue, if they don’t understand your first language though.

Delphinium, scabiosa, veronica and rose, from Fiore Dorato. Photo: Her World Brides December 2012 - February 2013

Carry their favourite blooms

Include your grandmothers’ (and mum’s for that matter) favourite flowers into your bouquet, and present it to them just after the ceremony or during the reception.

Include their marriage tips into your vows

Having been married for many, many years, you can consider asking your grandparents for tips on how to keep a marriage going in good times, and in bad, which you can include in your vow exchange, or wedding speeches. Alternatively, you can even repeat a part of their vows with your own during the ceremony.

Sing me a love song

Like your parents, you can dedicate your first dance (or other dances) to your grandparents’ favourite love songs, or the songs that were played during their wedding. You can even have assign time to dance with them after you’ve had your father-daughter, mother-son dance.

Photo booth

You can have your wedding portraits inspired by your grandparents' wedding pictures, and display them (with the "originals") during your reception or ceremony.

Special ceremonies

In Chinese weddings, the couple’s elders are honoured with the couple serving them sweet tea during the tea ceremony. If you’re not including that in your wedding, or you don’t have such a practice, you can allocate some time during the reception to present them with a special wedding gift to show that you’ve been thinking about them.

Accord them special flowers

Corsages and bouquets are one of the ways to recognise that a family member is deeply treasured by the couple at the wedding. You can arrange for an arrangement in your grandparents’ favourite blooms (or ones that feature significantly during their relationship or lifetime), or one that’s closely similar to your bouquet (and slightly larger or richer than the ones your wedding party may be wearing). Or, like your bouquet-giving ceremony for mum, you can have another bouquet specially for grandma, too.

Real bride Karen in a traditional Chinese bridal costume while waiting for her groom. Photo: Her World Brides December 2012 - February 2013.

Include precious mementoes

If they’ve got special keepsakes that mean a lot to them (such as a locket, charm or handkerchief), you can carry them with you in your bouquet, wedding dress, or feature them in the decorations, or incorporate them into your wedding monogram or logo.

Family heirlooms

Hand-me-down wedding dresses aren’t as common in Singapore, as brides here tend to rent their wedding dresses, but if your grandmother happens to have a piece of garment (like a veil) or fabric she wore at her own wedding, you can incorporate it into your bridal ensemble.

The good old days

You don’t have to have a vintage-themed wedding to inject a touch of nostalgia in your celebrations, but if you’d like to include your grandparents’ favourite music, snacks, food, and so on, feel free to do so!