From The Straits Times    |

Image: Farrah & Matthew’s outdoor wedding at Villa Cahaya, Bali

My coworkers assume that they are invited to my wedding. How do I politely let them know they’re not? 

If you’re not close to your co-workers, there really is no need to explain why they are not invited.

If you have budget constraints for your celebrations or have limited seating, then tell your colleagues the truth. Just let them know nicely and reasonably; they would understand and appreciate it more than you trying to avoid the issue.

And for those who are invited, do I have to invite their spouse? 
Invitations should go to people that you know personally and relatively well.

If you have never met your co-worker’s spouse, or know them only fleetingly, then there is no need to invite them for your celebrations.

You could invite them for the day reception instead of the dinner.  


Image: Apel Photography/Instagram

Can we ask guests not to post pictures of our wedding on social media?

It’s your wedding so you are entitled to make personal requests. 

You can get your emcee to tell your guests to refrain from taking pictures or posting them on social media, or list the request down in the invite and remind guests again at the start of your wedding celebrations. 

Explain to them why – some of your guests would not like their faces to be feature inadvertently on social media, or you prefer that the celebrations be kept private.

Image: Evermotion Photography/Instagram

My groom’s buddies want to follow our first dance with a choreographed rendition an R-rated rap song! Should I let them go for it?

If the performance and song clashes with the theme and mood of your celebrations, then tell them no (politely, though!); after all it’s your wedding!

As an option, they could have the segment during the reception before the banquet when guests are arriving so that it seems more like a fun and spontaneous performance; and they wouldn’t be many people around to see it!

Or you could introduce their performance at the party with a warning: Next up, a raunchy performance that’s R-rated! So close your eyes and ears or go for a toilet break if you’re sensitive or underage. 


I would love to have some balloons for my wedding but my fiancee’ thinks they’re childish.  Is there a way to have them in a tasteful, elegant way?

Ribbons can be childish too but selecting the right type of ribbons and using them in unique, creative ways can transform them into elegant, romantic decor elements.

Balloons in metallic or pearlescent, pastel hues can help add sheen and shine to your decor. Dressed with satiny ribbons and floating above your table settings, the shimmering spheres can look magical, adding a whimsical feel to your ambience.

You can also emboss or paint the balloons with table numbers and initials – it’s way more creative and fun than the usual table cards.

Image: Weddings By The Ungasan/Instagram

I love the idea of having colourful lights for my celebrations – they create a great mood for my party.  But I am afraid of how we will look in the pictures.

If you don’t want to look like one of the blue-skinned aliens showing up for work for the movie Avatar, avoid taking any pictures when the colourful lights are on.

If you want to capture the mood and lighting for the celebration, get your photographer to do distant shots that capture the ambience without showing any faces.

Another option is for your photographer to use a fill-in flash when shooting in such a setting. The result would be clear light on your facial features with the colourful lights as accents in the background.


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