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What with the recent Star Awards and Coachella, there’s a slew of #thehighlife pictures all over social media, making us (dangerously) green with envy. Here are some scary ways we might be subconsciously undermining our self-confidence:    

We think Instagram life = IRL

There you have it, probably the biggest culprit of damaged self-esteems. Social media being deemed ‘real life’.  It’s hard not to be envious or even jealous of people who seem to have it all and are leading ‘picture perfect’ lives. But let’s face it: Those Instagram feeds are extremely curated and of course, you wouldn’t be able to see their bad moments as it’s all about perception.

Remind yourself not to get caught up in this whole social media game, and do a detox if need be. Spending some time away from Instagram can help you see things in a clearer light.  


Constantly comparing ourselves to others

This is pretty much something we’re all guilty of. We tend to pit ourselves against other people, be it the super smart kid in school or the high-flying colleague at work. But this only gives us unnecessary pressure and more often than not, makes us question why we can never be like them.

Cut yourself some slack – we’re a work in progress. Recognise that some healthy competition is good, but don’t let the comparison consume you. Focus on charting your own growth and you’ll gain much satisfaction from seeing yourself improve.


Being overly dependent on makeup

We’re no stranger to the wonders of makeup, but beware: Are you being over reliant on it? Do you consider stepping out of the house au naturale a pure nightmare? We shouldn’t be piling on makeup to “hide our flaws”, instead, it’s meant to enhance our natural beauty.

In this day and age, it does take some courage to strut down Orchard Road sans makeup, but no one can bring you down when you’re feeling #likeaboss. Take a leaf out of these seven Asian celebs’ books and embrace your natural beauty; you’ll glow inside and out, we promise.  

READ MORE: Be the ultimate you: Self-confidence tips from Singapore writer Willabelle Ong and Practise these easy daily habits to boost your self-esteem

Getting stuck in the vicious cycle of negativity

Wake up, say “I can’t do this”, rinse, repeat…it can be hard to pull yourself out of this vicious cycle of negativity, but it’s a necessary step you’ll thank yourself for down the road. There’s no point living in negativity because you can’t change the tough circumstances you’re facing. But you can choose to be optimistic and trust that there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. It’s amazing how your mindset changes everything, so be bold and say #goodvibesonly.


Setting unrealistic goals

Sometimes, we tend to be overly ambitious and set unrealistic goals that we can’t achieve. This makes us feel bad about ourselves, and we start to doubt our capabilities, which is definitely bad news for our self-confidence in the long run. Don’t beat yourself up when you’re unable to achieve your goals. Instead, review your goals and try to make short term ones that are realistic.

Making impulse buys we think we can fit into ‘later on’

That oh-so-small bodycon dress has been hanging in your closet forever, and it’s guilt tripping you every day. Spare yourself the agony by making more rational shopping decisions. Having a negative body image AND wasting money is so not worth it.


Not investing in ourselves

When was the last time you did something for yourself? Sometimes, we get so caught up with life that we neglect our very selves. Having self-confidence is not an overnight miracle, but an ongoing project – take time off for yourself, be it reading a book or going shopping. Spending time alone helps you be in tune with your inner self. When you’re truly comfortable in your own skin, you’ll have that much more self-confidence *flicks hair*.

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