1 Encourage him to mix up his exercise routine
If your husband just pumps iron but doesn’t do any other exercise, it’s not as beneficial as exercising all of his muscles – that’s when his body’s natural testosterone production gets a boost. Encourage him to pick up a sport, like soccer with friends, or tennis with a colleague. Being fit pays off in all sorts of ways in the bedroom.
2 Let him go easy on the alcohol
While a little alcohol can help relax men, too much can cause a steep drop-off in testosterone levels and decrease libido, and erectile and orgasmic function. It also acts as a depressant to the nervous system.
3 Get him to avoid soya
Soya products such as soya milk, tofu, and tempeh contain natural estrogen-like compounds that can block testosterone production and function.
4 Help him avoid stress
Chronic stress takes a toll on his body and libido. Encourage him to do what he can to keep anxiety in check and release any excessive work pressure. Exercising and getting enough sleep are great stress busters.
5 Go for the thrill
Apparently, exhilarating experiences – of the roller coaster variety – can help make him perk up down there. After taking part in an adrenaline-pumping activity, his heart will be racing and his nervous system in high gear, just like they would be if he was sexually aroused. So encouraging him to be a thrill-seeker may pay off nicely in the bedroom!
If you’re used to him being the one who always initiates sex, and he loses his mojo for whatever reason, your sex life might come to a screeching halt. In this case, you need to step up your game. Let your hands wander a bit when you’re cuddling, put on some sexy lingerie, suggest trying new sexual positions or book a romantic staycation. Also, ask him if there’s something he’d like you to do during sex that you haven’t tried before.
7 Don’t make it just about the sex
Give your husband lots of loving, without sex being part of the equation. Cuddle and kiss him, hold his hand when you’re out in public, sit close to him on the sofa while you’re watching TV. Affection doesn’t always have to lead to intercourse, but if your husband feels appreciated and valued by you, he may start showing more interest in sex.
8 Don’t wait till bedtime
Don’t just schedule sex at the end of the day, when it’s highly likely that one of you might be tired. Mix it up with morning or weekend afternoon sex. Bringing back some spontaneity that you shared early in your relationship can be just the spark he needs.
9 Look at your own behaviour
Are you guilty of nagging and criticising him? Perhaps you’re not even aware of it, but if he sees you as a nag, he may withdraw emotionally and sexually. If you think this may be the case, try being a little more easygoing and understanding. Take note of the good things he does and be generous with compliments. It will make him feel closer to you, which could trigger his sexual desire.
10 Talk about it
Have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband about his low sex drive. Tell him you love him and want to be intimate with him on a more regular basis. Ask if he can explain why he isn’t so interested in sex anymore, and suggest counselling to help you work through it as a couple.