From The Straits Times    |

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve just met at a party or are on a date; you’ll still need to initiate sparkling, lively conversation. 

Yes, first impressions do count. Admit it or not, everyone has a mental scorecard (or checklist), even if its located deep within the subconscious. Coming across witty and intelligent will add another point to your total score.

So here are some tricks out of our book to help you rake in the points:

FUNNY ANECDOTE 
Everyone’s got something funny that’s happened to them in their lifetime. It’s time to break your story out! Emphasize the humor of the situation, as that’s a sure-fire way to put anyone at ease. It also shows you’re easy-going and can laugh at yourself.

Here, I’ll start: Call me largely unfortunate, but… a donkey sneezed on me when I was 17. I was on holiday in Australia and couldn’t think of anything else but finding a horse to ride. When I was promised horses on an scheduled animal farm trip, I jumped at the chance. However, the closest thing to horse on that farm was a donkey. 

Short of options, I started to get friendly with it. In fact, I stood there for almost an hour petting this particular donkey, who seemed to be enjoying all the attention. Unfortunately, he enjoyed it so much he delivered a whole snout-full of sticky black snot onto my pristine white shirt. 

AN ACE JOKE
The difference between a joke and a pick-up line boils down to how quickly the other party backs away from you. A joke breaks the discomfort that comes with meeting someone new, and will put your companion at ease. Everyone should be equipped with a good joke for such situations.

AN EXCITING EVENT
If you just watched your favorite band in concert, or if a loony relative tied the knot last week, now’s a good time to share that experience. Keep it light-hearted and fun, and other party might contribute to the conversation with an exciting event of their own.

HOBBIES
It’s good to let on that you have a life outside your office. Talk about your hobbies and ask leading questions so the other party can share too. 

Mr. Right wakeboards regularly, and at one point, he was also coaching. One weekend, he offered to teach me and I agreed. Unfortunately, my idea of a hobby is putting words on a screen, so I didn’t last very long at the sport. But no matter, it kick-started the relationship we have today.

MUSICAL INTERESTS
Music brings people together, and it’s the easiest thing to talk about when you’re at a party. Discuss your favorite artists, or the ones most despised. I’d personally open with: "While I think it’s great that Justin Bieber and Barney the Dinosaur have so much in common, I think that’s been a little detrimental to his reputation."

PROFESSION
You are what you do. Learning about your companion’s profession is the quickest way to understand them better. You’ll learn what makes the person tick, why they’re in that particular field and what they love most about it. 

THE NEAR FUTURE
Whether it’s that dream trip to Europe or a cooking class, we’ve all got plans for the near future. Share them to show off your sense of adventure and you just might get the ball rolling towards that next date!

PET PEEVES
Mr. Right and I share many pet peeves, which is probably why we see eye-to-eye most of the time. Discussing a pet peeve might lead you to find some common ground. Start with, "Don’t you hate it when…" and remember to keep it light-hearted and humorous. In other words, don’t go on a verbal rampage.

FAVOURITE NOSH
Singaporean or not, you’ll be hard pressed to find someone who doesn’t relish good food. Ask about your companion’s favorite cuisines and restaurants to keep the conversation flowing, and maybe even casually initiate plans for dinner.

FRIENDS & FAMILY
Sometimes, your loved ones themselves make for very interesting anecdotes. Use that to your advantage by swapping stories. 

My best friends are truly interesting people. One produces television shows, another is a writer like me (perhaps even funnier), and the last is an accident and emergency nurse.

I love telling people about my friends and their stories (involving celebrities and sick, drunk people). For example, I’ve been privy to a story about a man who arrived at a hospital with a shaving cream canister up his anal passage (he claimed to have sat on it).

Now, go forth, be sociable and score the love of your life (or a new friend)! 

Alisa Chopard is a writer and a lover of all things satisfying, including good food and fabulous fashion.