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We just know we’re not the only ones who are secretly envious of women who claim to be able to have multiple orgasms. What about women whose orgasms are so hard and intense that they quiver and shake – and even um, squirt?

These women aren’t sex experts or sex goddesses, but they do know one thing that many women don’t – they know how to control their sexual pleasure and make it work in their favour. And the good news is that you can, too.

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First things first – know your orgasm

It’s hard to bring yourself to orgasm multiple times or to harness your pleasure and let it all out in one big, explosive orgasmic episode if you don’t first familiarise yourself with the inner workings of your body first.

To begin with, an orgasm isn’t just an orgasm. It can last for a split second or much longer. You can have just one or they can (pardon the pun) come one after another, allowing you to experience waves upon waves of pleasure.

To improve your chances of climaxing, it’s important to be relaxed; that means no thoughts about that pile of paperwork awaiting you at work, please. Second, you have to know what turns you on and what you need to do to get yourself to that point of no return – will it help to fantasise about a specific sexual scenario or get into a certain sex position? Do you need more clitoral stimulation or extra kisses and caresses from your man? Knowing what you need is crucial to feeling more in control of your sexual pleasure.

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How to have a prolonged and intense orgasm   

Knowing how to bring yourself to orgasm is one thing, but you must also know how to hold it back or stop it from becoming a “full” or “complete” orgasm. It’s not as difficult as you think: When you’re at the point where you feel that your orgasm is close, shift your goal to something else, or tell yourself that you’re not ready to climax just yet. Tell your partner to stop stimulating your genitals and focus instead on another part of your body.

What you want to do is take yourself back to the starting point and build up your pleasure again. Then, like before, once you can sense that you’re about to be taken over the edge, rein yourself back in. Repeat this a few times, and soon you won’t be able to hold it back any longer. When you finally allow yourself the release, you’ll notice that it lasts longer and feels harder and more powerful than usual. Win!

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How to have multiple orgasms

Think of this as experiencing a few small orgasms in succession or a couple of small ones followed by a big one. First, build up your pleasure until you feel that you’re on the brink of climaxing. Then, allow yourself to orgasm but don’t exactly bring yourself to the finish line – you want to have what can be called a “mini” orgasm.

At this point, you may want to ask your partner to slow down whatever he’s doing to get you off, be it stimulating your clitoris manually, performing oral sex on you, or penetrating you vaginally. Try to keep yourself on the edge of pleasure without actually falling off the cliff of glory, so to speak. You only want your man to slow down for a few seconds before picking up speed again. Let him tease you to the point of climax and then instruct him to slow down after you’ve experienced another “mini orgasm”. You can repeat this as many times as you like, so that you have several mini orgasms during the one session, culminating in one explosively exquisite burst of pleasure!