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If you’re married or getting married soon, you’re almost certainly inundated with advice from friends who think they know better. And while they do mean well, it’s hard to sieve fact from fiction as everyone has their two cents’ worth on how to make your marriage better. There may be tons of marriage cliches out there but here are five that are actually true.
1. Don’t Go To Bed Angry
If you put things into perspective, you’ll realise that most arguments with your spouse aren’t worth losing sleep over. Unless it’s a major issue in your relationship (eg. he’s cheating on you, he’s been declared bankrupt etc), talk about it and reach a conclusion before you go to bed. If you can’t agree, learn to agree to disagree. Most importantly, let it go.
2. Have Your Own Life
Just because you’re married doesn’t mean your world should revolve around your husband. Yes, you enjoy his company and love doing things with him but you don’t have to be with him 24/7. Keep your social life with your friends, spend time with your family without him and have some ‘me time’ to do whatever you want, whether it’s reading, watching a movie or just going for a walk. You still need to keep your own identity, as does your husband.
3. Variety Is The Spice Of Life
Whether it’s a new sex position, a cuisine you’ve never tried before or a sport you never dreamt you’d ever do, try something new with your man every now and again. Chances are he pretty much knew everything about you before marrying you so discovering new things together is one way to keep your marriage exciting, as long as both of you consent to it (ie. don’t drag him around to do something you want to do).
4. Every Marriage Is Different
This is probably the most important thing to remember. Don’t compare yourselves to other couples because nobody knows what’s really going on in someone else’s life (even if they do post it all on social media!). For example, don’t ever ask your husband why he never does what so-and-so’s husband always does for her. He deserves more than that from you.
5. Don’t Keep Score
One of the biggest mistakes people make in a relationship is doing something for their partner expecting something in return. That’s not what marriage is about. Be yourself, give your best in every situation and hope that your husband does the same. Keeping score only makes you bitter and bitterness never did relationships any good.
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