3 tips for a better marriage

Illustration: Justyna Pszczolka, 123rf.com

We all need love to lead more fulfilling lives. As 18th-century French novelist Amantine-Lucile-Aurore Dupin once said: “There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” 

Getting married is only the beginning. Living happily together takes a whole lot of work. Dr Daniel Koh, a psychologist, said: “A healthy relationship is not a matter of who does more but rather, both individuals trusting and believing in each other. They complement each other’s strengths and weaknesses to help each other fulfil their dreams.” Dr Koh shares some secrets to make love last a lifetime. 

Believe in your spouse and have confidence in whatever he or she does

Having faith in your partner is the basis for trust, which in turn gives you the assurance that he or she is loyal to you. 

Resolve disagreements immediately 

Every relationship will have its fair share of disputes and quarrels. If something is not right, settle it immediately. Don’t let it drag out or give each other the cold shoulder. This is unhealthy. Your pent-up feelings will cause you to be discontented and resent your partner. Both husband and wife must be able to speak openly to each other about their feelings on any issue. Talk things out calmly. Listen, support and respect each other in your decisions, instead of just fixing problems and moving on. 

Compromise


Accept your partner’s idiosyncrasies and see things from different perspectives. Instead of thinking your spouse should change, think about how you can change too. This will make the relationship last longer. Bear in mind that any compromise made has to be for an acceptable or valid reason, for instance, if it benefits the overall well- being of the relationship. 

Also Read: How to fix things when you and your spouse don’t talk anymore

This story was originally published in The Straits Times Classified on May 25, 2016. Download The Straits Times Classified app available free at the Apple App or Google Play stores.