My Life Abroad: A journey of growth and community building in Texas

Curious what it would be like to work or study abroad? My Life Abroad is a column by Her World that gives a glimpse into the lives of women from Singapore who have pursued their dreams and ambitions overseas. If you would like to share your experience, please email us at magherworld@sph.com.sg with the subject “My Life Abroad” in your email header, and one of our editors will get back to you.

In today’s column, we speak with Li Fong, 52, who is a subtle energies researcher and moved to Houston, Texas with her 11-year-old and 10-year-old children in 2016. This came after her husband was offered an internal transfer at work and moved there a few months prior from Singapore.

Before moving to Texas, I did not know much about the place and had only visited it once while my husband was already living there. With just three months to prepare and no specific expectations, I arrived with an open mind, and it turned out to be a blessing in disguise. This allowed me to experience Texas free from preconceived notions.

I was immediately struck by the vastness of Texas—the wide open spaces, large parking lots, and endless sky. The clouds seemed so close. That initial impression has only deepened over time, especially when I catch a breathtaking sunset while traveling along the highway.

But relocating wasn’t without its challenges, especially in the beginning. Before moving, I had embarked on high-risk projects and taken on a significant loan. Had I stayed in Singapore, I wouldn’t have had trouble repaying it, but relocating disrupted my ability to sustain those projects. At the same time, I struggled to secure job opportunities in both Singapore and Texas. My savings were rapidly depleting as I continued to meet my financial obligations, and the stress took a toll on my mental wellbeing.

On the surface, I appeared fine, but I knew I wasn’t. My pride and ego held me back from seeking my husband’s support, and I tried to shoulder everything alone. However, eventually, I reached a breaking point—and in hindsight, that breakdown was a gift. It forced me to shift my perspective. I accepted my situation and reached out to renegotiate my repayment schedule.

One project I refused to let go of was my tabletop game community initiative, SingaPlorers, which I started in 2015. Thanks to the unwavering support of my team in Singapore, we continued bringing the game to various communities until 2018. The satisfaction was immeasurable when the project was later featured in the MOE Upper Secondary Social Studies Coursebook and received the NIC Award (2019) for its significant contributions to community integration.

While driving these community projects, an unexpected opportunity came my way. A client, who had seen my previous work, offered me a project that ultimately helped clear my financial obligations. From there, I transitioned into coaching, subtle-energy work, and holistic wellness, building my client base from scratch. 

Growing closer as a family

Neither of my children resisted nor showed particular enthusiasm when they first learned about the move. However, the real challenges surfaced after we arrived in Houston. My daughter struggled to make friends at school, and my son faced difficulties with the school management. To support them, we began having nightly heart-to-heart chats before bedtime. As they opened up, I realised they’d felt a sense of disconnection and frustration even back in Singapore—something I hadn’t fully understood while juggling my own commitments.

My husband and I guided our daughter with social interaction strategies and encouraged her artistic pursuits, which she discovered after moving to Texas. Over time, she gained confidence and went on to win several awards in both art and academics. As for our son, we actively communicated with his school’s management to advocate for his interests and address his challenges, especially since he was born with moderate hearing loss in both ears. We were fortunate to have a very supportive school administration. With their help, we secured special needs support, which enabled him to excel in his studies and explore leadership opportunities. He stepped out of his comfort zone, trying things he might not have considered in Singapore—like joining the choir (which later won a prestigious award) and learning American Sign Language (ASL). He also accelerated his education, completing high school in just three years instead of four, and achieved excellent academic results.

Our nightly conversations continued for years, helping our children develop adaptability, resilience, and self-awareness—traits that have carried them through high school and beyond. As parents, my husband and I have become our children’s strongest advocates, supporting them as they pursue their passions with integrity and ensuring they have the resources to thrive.

Building communities away from home

One challenge I’m still working on is driving long distances, especially on highways to destinations more than an hour away. Since there is virtually no public transportation in my city, driving is essential. I used to only drive within my city, but I was on a book tour last year which pushed me beyond my comfort zone. Now, I can drive to places about an hour away with more confidence, though I have yet to attempt longer journeys.

The book tour was for “Unique Wisdom”, a project I worked on with the Singapore Global Network. It gathered perspectives from Singaporeans and friends of Singapore worldwide, offering insights that may be helpful to those living abroad.

My passion for creating community initiatives such as SingaPlorers continues to burn bright. In 2020, I co-founded a WhatsApp group for Singaporeans in Texas, initially to stay connected during the pandemic. Over time, it has evolved into a supportive space where we share uniquely Singaporean experiences and help each other navigate life here. Being away from family and friends was initially difficult, but having a close-knit community has eased that transition.

We ran a “Singapore Got Talent” event in 2021 and a “Therapeutic Art Contest” and “Holistic Wellness Virtual Summit” in 2022 just to name a few. This year, I’ve been dedicated to a project called “Unique Wisdom Festival 2025 - Riding the Rainbows”, a non-profit online platform celebrating wisdom, creativity and conscious collaboration. It is set to launch from mid-July to September, just in time to celebrate Singapore’s 60th birthday! 

Since moving to Texas, I’ve also earned my PhD in Holistic Life Coaching and am currently studying AI technologies. I enjoy learning, even subjects like metaphysical science which I would not have thought possible before. Such courses and creative collaborations have enabled me to connect with brilliant minds from around the world.

Over the years, there were moments when my family and I considered returning back to Singapore but we ultimately decided to stay, knowing it would be better for my husband’s career and that reintegrating our children into the Singapore education system wouldn’t be easy. Nevertheless, our family of four remain Singapore citizens and my husband and I are keen to return home when we eventually retire to be closer to family.

My son’s now back in Singapore serving National Service and my daughter is studying at Nanyang Technological University (NTU). They have both been making plans to have short trips back to the U.S. to visit friends, which is wonderful as it allows them to maintain those important relationships.

A day in my life

These days, I consider myself to be semi-retired, so I’ve become more mindful of my pace, making sure I fully enjoy each moment. I think my pace of living would be very different had I remained in Singapore. I would likely be even more focused on work and community initiatives, leaving little room for true balance between professional pursuits, family and personal exploration. Living in Texas has helped me balance work, family, and personal interests more harmoniously. It’s allowed me to be present for my family, including my elderly parents who I speak with regularly over calls, and explore new passions like wellness art, energy experiments, and AI model training—areas I might have never ventured into as I used to shy away from technology. 

My day starts at 5.30am, preparing breakfast and a lunchbox for my husband before he leaves for work at 6am. After that, I begin my subtle energy practices for my family and homes, followed by calls with my mother, mother-in-law, and two children. By 10am, I shift my focus to work—this includes online meetings with project partners, ongoing studies in AI technologies, investment monitoring, subtle energy experiments, wellness art and creations, and community initiatives.

In the late afternoon, around 4pm, I spend time with my husband, either going to the gym or for a walk in our neighborhood. Then, evenings are for when I dedicate time to meditation and dinner preparation, and dinner is followed by online coaching calls or discussions with business partners at home before unwinding with TV at 9.30pm. I usually retire to bed by 10.30pm. 

On weekends, I might shop, meet friends or assist my husband with his photography sessions, as well as catch up with family in Singapore, exercise and have weekly online mentoring sessions.

Advice for those relocating

My advice to anyone relocating is to embrace the present moment. Instead of overthinking the uncertainties ahead, focus on what you can enjoy in your new environment first. When you do, opportunities to connect and thrive will naturally unfold.

Living in Texas has reinforced a valuable lesson: while there will always be situations I may not prefer, instead of invalidating them, I choose to find ways to turn them into positive outcomes. This mindset helps me bounce back quickly and make every moment meaningful.