From The Straits Times    |
jayley_rec

Photo: Jayley Woo/Facebook

Bullying is a problem that affects everyone in society and it’s a problem that doesn’t discriminate – young or old, we’ve either experienced it first-hand or know someone who has been bullied in some way.

Bringing others down through their ugly words and actions, bullies can be found in every schoolyard, office and most other place where people congregate.  

Even celebrities who seem to have it all aren’t free from the torment of bullying. As an adolescent, local actress, Jayley Woo, was teased and bullied by her peers.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by 胡佳琪 Jayley Woo (@jiaqiwoo) on

In a recent Instagram post, Jayley candidly admitted that she was a victim of bullying in her secondary school days. She was tormented by bullies who picked on her because she was a class representative.

“As the class representative, my classmates hated me whenever I told on them to the teachers,” Jayley told local media when asked about her experience with being ostracised. She added that: “All I wanted to do every day was to hide in one corner in school.”

But the star made it through her bully troubles and credits the friends she made at the Institute of Technical Education (ITE) with giving her the confidence to do so.

She also found an outlet for her frustration and pain: blogging. Together with her older twin sister and fellow entertainer, Hayley Woo, Jayley started a blog called “Jay on the Hay.”

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by 胡佳琪 Jayley Woo (@jiaqiwoo) on

Today, the actress uses her experiences and the memories of being bullied in her acting and to connect with her insecure character in the drama “Glitch,” Chloe Ling.

Unfortunately, bullying isn’t just a problem for children and teenagers. Most of us may also encounter adult bullies at certain points in our lives.

An adult bully can be a toxic boss or colleague, an overly controlling romantic partner, an unreasonable neighbor, a condescending family member or other types of abusive relationships.

 

So what can you do if you get bullied as an adult?

Photo: 123rf

According to an article published by the Wexner Medical Centre, bullies gain a sense of satisfaction from your reaction to the unfair treatment. Don’t react to the attack. Rather, listen to the points raised by the bully and respond as the voice of reason.

If it’s happening in the workplace, you want to keep a paper trail of emails to document the bully’s bad behaviour. You also want to document what you’re working on and what you have accomplished. Use emails, activity reports and tools to share with your co-workers and supervisors about what you are doing to prevent the bully from forcing you out or ruining your chances for promotion.

Lastly, confrontation and exposure, with evidence to support a victim’s accusations, are what bullies try hardest to avoid. If you are being victimised, confront your bully if you feel up to it or ask a trusted person to do it on your behalf. Alternatively, you can also hire a solicitor. The point to note here is to expose the bully and call him or her to account.

Most importantly, don’t allow the bullying to define you as a person. You do not deserve to be bullied. Place the responsibility for the bullying on the shoulders of the bully and try to move on from the hurtful words and actions.

 

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