'I fell in love with a stranger'

“When I lived in Hong Kong, my parents had their own flat, while my two sisters and I shared another unit a few floors below.

I liked the idea of couch-surfing – which I had tried in the summer of 2012 on a trip to Europe – and decided to open my flat to couch-surfers from around the globe. It was easy – I simply started an account on www.couchsurfing.com and waited for travellers to come knocking. (Honestly, I didn’t get my parents’ permission – they always thought I had friends staying over!)

“My sisters and I had our own bedrooms, so when we had couch-surfers, they would either sleep in my room or the living room.”

FIRST IMPRESSIONS
“In October 2012, Joshua Phang (who is a year older than I am) and two of his friends got in touch with me via the Couchsurfing site. They had been working in China as part of a hotel training management course, but had no place to stay over the weekend because of a room-booking goof-up. Before I knew it, two men and one woman from Singapore were unpacking in my living room.

“There was no immediate attraction between Joshua and me, but I did notice his smile and cute dimples. The aww thing about him was that he loved playing with my four cats.

“I learnt that he couldn’t hold his alcohol very well. On the first night, Joshua, his friends and I went to a pub, and he got tipsy after his second mug of beer. That didn’t deter his friends from sending more beer his way. Feeling bad for him, I volunteered to drink it on his behalf. (He revealed later – when we were dating – that that gesture had made him think there was ‘something special about this girl’.)

“The group left the next day, and Joshua and I kept in touch via Whatsapp.”

THINGS DEVELOP
“I made a trip to Singapore the following January to catch up with friends. During my week-long stay, I caught up with Joshua over dinner and drinks; he also sent me messages on Whatsapp constantly. When it was warm, he would write ‘remember to drink more water’; when I told him I was going to visit Legoland Malaysia, he wrote ‘take care of yourself, I still want to see you tomorrow’.

“All this stirred my curiosity, so I asked a mutual friend if Joshua liked me. His reply was: ‘I’ve asked him and he said no.’ I was a little disappointed, but we maintained our correspondence over Whatsapp when I returned to Hong Kong.

“In the next few months, we planned short holidays to Hong Kong, Macau and China with other friends. As a result, Joshua and I got to know each other better.

“Once, I got really upset – okay, jealous – that he was planning a trip to Hainan with a woman whom he insisted was just a friend. He asked me to join them, but I didn’t have enough days of leave from work. It was our first fi ght (albeit over Whatsapp), but it made us realise we had feelings for each other.

“I needed to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth, so I asked him if he liked me, and he said yes. He hadn’t admitted it earlier for fear of ruining our friendship or, worse, that I wouldn’t reciprocate his feelings.

“We planned a trip to Taiwan – this time, it was just the two of us – where he held my hand for the first time as we ran across a road! After that, he did the same at every street we crossed.

“Things finally became official last January. I was in Singapore, and the day before I left for Hong Kong, he gave me a charm bracelet and a handmade card that read: “Will you be my girlfriend?” He had drawn two boxes with the words ‘yes’ and ‘no’ below them, respectively. I ticked the box above ‘yes’, of course.”

MOVING TO SINGAPORE
“I couldn’t stand being apart from Joshua, so I decided to relocate to Singapore. Joshua was so ecstatic when I first broke the news about a job offer that he started researching places where I could stay. He planned itineraries for our weekend dates, and made sure we did fun stuff so I wouldn’t be bored – so thoughtful!

“To tell the truth, the move has been tough for both of us. It’s stressful for me because I’m away from family and friends; it’s stressful for Joshua because he is the only outlet I have for all my frustrations, which can be overwhelming for him.

“Sometimes, when work takes its toll, I feel tempted to drop everything and go back to Hong Kong for good, but spending time with Joshua on weekends diminishes the difficult moments – he’s the reason I’ve stayed.”

Photography: Frenchescar Lim, Art Directin: Alice Chua, Styling: CK, assisted by Grace Lim, Hair: Ashloi, using Redken, Makeup: Vicky Lee, using Etude House, On Yuki: Outfit: Tory Burch, Necklace: Bimba Y Lola, On Joshua: Outfit: Hugo

This story was first published in Her World Magazine August 2015.

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