Image: Lunch Click

Breakups are never easy. Sometimes you don’t even get to have a say in whether or not it’s going to happen.

Every once in a while, you might be unlucky enough to find yourself in one of those situations where you didn’t even know what the hell just happened.

One minute you were cracking a really witty joke and the next, he’s leaving you because he doesn’t like how you have no respect for boundaries.

And before you can even say, “Hey can we just talk about this for a second-” he’s already burnt all your letters and blocked you on Whatsapp. Let’s face it: these things happen. This is how you deal with it.

1. Wallow
Yep, you heard it. Sometimes what we all need is just a really good cry because life can really really suck.

Don’t overdo it, though. Give yourself a week tops. Sit in your room in the dark, listen to some really emotional music and keep asking yourself over and over again what you’ve done to deserve this.

When that’s done and all the pain and negativity has left your body, move on. You owe yourself that much.

2. Set your inner psycho free
Had a little too much to drink and thinking of sending that really long and rambly text about how your feelings were misled and manipulated and that you still have no idea what just happened?

Do it. It’s better than staring at that screen and waiting for the explanation you’ll never get. This could be a lot more cathartic than you expected. 

3. Purge
If you’re feeling bitter and resentful, and the last thing you want is to see your ex or hear their voice ever again, then this might just work for you.

Gather everything that he or she ever gave you, put it all in an old and crappy looking box, and dump it down the rubbish chute.

For dramatic effect, you can even set it on fire. Have a good laugh and tell yourself to move on. Every now and then, all of us end up wasting our lives on things that once meant the world to us.

4. Go to war
People like to talk about avoiding confrontation. Those, however, are the same people who haven’t suffered the same injustice you have.

If you think you need to cause a scene, if you need to throw that glass of beer in his or her face for the purpose of demanding answers or just general shaming, do it. All’s fair in love and war.

These methods are only justifiable if you can say for sure that none of what happened was actually your fault or remotely reasonable at all. If, for the longest time, you’ve been the most difficult person to be with, then this isn’t about you. Remember, breakups happen all the time. Sometimes it’s your fault and sometimes it’s not. What matters is that you find a way to keep your life moving forward and not drowning in the past.


This article was originally published on LunchClick’s blog. LunchClick is Singapore’s first female-centric dating app, find out more here