2024 was definitely the year of the MILFs

“Cougar” has always been a fairly derisive term, its continued use underscoring the lingering taboo around relationships in which the woman is significantly older than the man.

The word suggests predation rather than romance, and the lack of an equivalent pejorative for the far more common older man-younger woman pairing suggests a double standard at play.

So, it has been fascinating to see Hollywood defy that cultural script in 2024 with a string of steamy age-gap romances starring Oscar-winning actresses opposite much younger male actors.

Anne Hathaway’s 40-year-old gallery owner falls for a 24-year-old boy band heart-throb (Nicholas Galitzine) in the romantic comedy-drama The Idea Of You (2024), which was released on Prime Video.

Sparks fly between Laura Dern’s 50-something author and a 30-something finance guy (Liam Hemsworth) in the Netflix drama Lonely Planet (2024).

And Nicole Kidman’s middle-aged writer catches the eye of a movie star 16 years her junior in the romantic drama A Family Affair (2024) on Netflix.

The actress pops up again in erotic thriller Babygirl – opening in Singapore cinemas on Jan 2 – as an executive in her 50s lured into an affair with a 20-something intern (Harris Dickinson).

And then there is Gwyneth Paltrow, 52, who was photographed locking lips with Timothee Chalamet, 29, for their upcoming movie Marty Supreme, a sports biopic to be released later in 2025.

The younger man-older woman trope is hardly new.

Paving the way were classic rom-coms such as The Graduate (1967), which saw Anne Bancroft seduce Dustin Hoffman despite the characters’ 20-year age gap. And in Harold And Maude (1971), Ruth Gordon’s octogenarian charmed Bud Cort’s morose 20-year-old.

But the difference with this new batch of movies is their glamorous, almost aspirational quality, as well as their powerhouse female stars.

Kidman and Dern, both 57, and Hathaway, 42, are Oscar winners and respected performers who bring gravitas to roles that might otherwise be dismissed as froth.

These May-December romances also imagine their leading ladies as pursued rather than pursuing, and by men who are archetypes of modern erotic fantasy – a pop idol, a movie star and an intern.

And these mostly end on a positive, empowering note, if not an outright happily-ever-after.

Contrast that with the terrible things that happen to Jennifer Lopez’s 40-something schoolteacher in erotic thriller The Boy Next Door (2015), after she has a one-night stand with her 19-year-old neighbour (Ryan Guzman).

Or to Julianne Moore in May December (2023), a psychological drama based on the true story of an American schoolteacher in her 30s who was jailed for having sex with a 12-year-old boy.

More recent releases have largely steered clear of ethically dubious waters such as these.

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The boss-and-underling goings-on in Babygirl might invite a phone call from human resources, but manage to flip the usual power dynamic on its head with a very kinky storyline.

The Idea Of You and A Family Affair were similarly buzzy, mainstream hits that were largely well-received.

The exception was Lonely Planet, which got mixed reviews – its plot criticised by some for being emotionally shallow and its leads for a lack of chemistry.

But one suspects the appearance of sexual chemistry – or age-appropriateness – can often be attributed to aesthetics.

Face it: These movies would not work quite so well if their female leads did not look exceptionally youthful.

This is down to a cocktail of genetics, lifestyle and a growing arsenal of cosmetic enhancements that include plastic surgery, fillers, Botox and the latest anti-ageing supplements (although none of these actresses has confirmed having had major work done).

Hathaway murmurs “I’m old enough to be your mother” as her 30-year-old co-star goes in for a kiss, but the actress’ unlined visage says otherwise.

The fact that she looks more like a contemporary than his mum undoubtedly helps the story resonate.

So, movies like these are saying female desirability does not have an expiration date – but are using sleight of hand to sell the idea.

Still, it is a refreshing change from the old playbook.

And if you cannot rewrite the rules of love and gravity occasionally, what is the point of making movies?

This article was originally published in The Straits Times.