Are you or aren’t you? Dating exclusively, that is. You’ve been spending a crazy amount of time together and he makes your heart race, but you have yet to have “The Talk” with each other and your relationship status on Facebook still says “Single”. All your friends want to know where things are going with this dude – and to be honest, so do you.
The last thing you want to do is rock the boat or come across as desperate and needy, though, so you’ve resisted raising the subject with him. Besides, isn’t it up to the guy to decide if you’re in a relationship or not?
The answer to that is No. Deciding whether to date each other exclusively is something both you and the guy should have a hand in. If he were even remotely serious about you, the conversation wouldn’t scare him. In fact, he would welcome talking about it with you and might even be relieved that you were the one who brought it up first.
Nuff said. If you’re still trying to find out if this guy is serious about your relationship and if you’re thinking of taking it to new heights, here we’ve sussed out the top 10 signs to look out for in a guy to find out if he’s serious about you.
He’s asked you how many kids you’ve always dreamt of having, where you see yourself living in 10 or 20 years’ time, and whether or not you plan to start your own business. He is interested in your thoughts and dreams for the future because he wants to know if and how he’s going to fit into all of them.
Does he make plans with you in advance, organise dates or outings, and asks what you’re doing two weekends from now? A guy who is serious about you will make the time for you and ensure that he gets every chance he can to see you. You are not his “back-up” girl for when his main plans fall through, you are always his first choice.
For instance, he has come right out and said that he loves being with you, that he likes you, or that you are “awesome” and “cool”. If he is not verbally expressive with his feelings, he has shown you that he’s into you – for example, he’s offered to help you with your chores, encourages you if you’re going through something difficult, or calls you after you’ve enjoyed a night on the town with your friends, to make sure that you got home safe.
He doesn’t just comment on the way you look. He wants to know what you’re like on the inside. He wants to know what your passions are, what you were like as a child, what you like to do with your family and friends, and what that work meeting you had yesterday was about. If you’ve accomplished something, he also wants to celebrate that achievement with you.
He might have asked you this outright, or gone about it in a roundabout way, for instance: “So, uh, do you like hanging out with me?” or “What do you think about me so far?”.
No explanation is really needed here. This shows that you’re foremost in his thoughts. If he’s happy he wants you to be happy with him, and if he’s sad, he wants to be able to share how he feels with you, and possibly lean on you for support.
If you are important to him and definitely someone that he can imagine having a future with, he will want his buddies to know who you are. And likewise, he wants to be “in” with your circle of friends, because he wants them to know that he’s an important presence in your life.
He does not take you for granted. So, he might call you during the day just to find out how work is going, or he might want to know if you’ve already eaten. But at the same time, he does not demand that you report your every move to him and respect your space.
This is an important sign because it shows that he wants to be the only guy in your life and is curious about whether or not you agree. In addition, he has indicated that he’s not interested in seeing other girls because you’re definitely the one for him.
It’s the small things that count. If he remembers how you like your coffee, your little pet peeves and habits, you can at least be sure that he cares about you and is thoughtful enough to take note. These things are crucial in a relationship and are definitely a good sign of his feelings for you.
If a man is genuinely interested in you, you won’t have to worry about chasing after him. That’s because men who are only looking for flings will not invest their time in you. Those looking for a genuine relationship will make the time and effort to meet you and talk to you, instead of ghosting you or leaving you with no response. Essentially, if they’re interested, you will not have to continuously try to get his attention.
Most of the time guys who aren’t serious in relationships and prefer to keep things casual will avoid labelling the relationship. They might be afraid of commitment or they haven’t recovered from their previous relationship. Whatever the case is, if he’s serious about your relationship he will not shy away or avoid being labelled as your boyfriend.
If most or all of these signs are there, then it’s an indication that you’re special to him and that he’s already treating you like his steady girlfriend. In this case, he might be ready for “The Talk”. Good luck, girl!