Ms Joanna Portilla is a member of the Ministry of Social and Family Development-led Alliance for Action (Support for Young Couples) and co-founder of The Collective Effort LLP.
Having worked with countless couples as a marriage solemniser, I have found that there are a few evergreen truths and essentials for any long-lasting and fulfilling marriage.
Firstly, communication is key. We must talk it out to express how we feel and also listen to how the other person feels. If we don’t communicate, we are only guessing the other person’s sentiments, which may worsen the situation.
Secondly, acknowledge that a problem exists. Be ready to admit that it could be your fault and be open to apologising and making amends. Be big-hearted to say “I’m sorry” if you have to.
Lastly, reminisce. Thinking back on the good times can remind you of why you both chose to walk the journey of life together. It also allows you to remember your vows, where you promised each other to be there “in good times and in bad”. Therefore, whatever you are facing is just one rough patch which the two of you can and should weather through.
That said, before talking to your spouse, you should take time alone for self-reflection. Here are three questions which encapsulate the pointers above to ask yourself during this time.