Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are no more royals: Here’s what we can learn from them

Family or not, both Harry and Meghan put their mental health first and left toxic environments behind. Harry was not happy with how the press and, to some extent, his family treated his wife. Reports about him and his older brother, Prince William, not getting along and the separation of their charity outlets as well as social media kept rumours strife of feuding brothers. Harry’s outspoken talks about his mental health and his mother’s death that he still deals with has opened him up to more scrutiny.

In a Guardian commentary by Tanya Gold, she said, “the drama is profitable. To some newspapers the royal family is meat to be consumed.”

Even at their last royal engagement at the Commonwealth Day service, there were reports of the brothers behaving coldly towards each other. A lip reader had said Harry was not pleased with Prince Williams’ greeting to him and there were comments about Harry and Meghan seated at second row. The negativity will not end, will it?

Tanya pointed out that Harry had said ‘“I think being part of this family, in this role, in this job, every single time I see a camera,” Harry said, “every single time I hear a click, every single time I see a flash it takes me straight back.” He also said: “I will not be bullied into carrying on a game that killed my mum.”’

Meghan suffered a lot of vile press that was racist, sexist and classist, whether the press want to admit to that or not. Her own family sold their stories about her. When Buzzfeed did a headline comparison between the press’ treatment of Kate Middleton versus Meghan, the results were obvious. How can we blame them for wanting to leave all this behind?

Critics said they were whiny, ungrateful and should have their lives scrutinised because taxpayers fund them. While most people have sympathised with Harry’s life in the spotlight especially after all that happened to his mother, there seemed to be lesser care when he talks about his mental health. It is as if celebrities, especially royalty, are not allowed to be unhappy.

As for Meghan, she chose to marry into this life and to one who was considered one of the most eligible bachelors. A regular girl scored a prince, what more could you ask for? Well, she wants a life where is she not judged for every single thing and some peace with the man she loves and privacy for their child.

When Meghan publicly said she was unhappy, that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. How dare she? Royalty are not allowed to be unhappy. Feel it, sure, but never show it.

Meghan had said on the ITV interview with Tom Bradby, “I really tried to adopt this British sensibility of a ‘stiff upper lip’… I really tried, but I think that what that does internally is probably really damaging. I never thought that this would be easy, but I thought it would be fair.” And “fair” is one thing Meghan hasn’t been granted.

To have your feelings dismissed over and over again, it is no wonder they want to live on their own terms to validate their own lives for themselves, not involving others.

With their decision to part from their royal duties, they have put themselves first before anyone else. All the planning and discussions they have made thus far have steered them into a direction they can now dictate for themselves.

A commentary by Kate Townshend in the Independent said, “No one has the responsibility to sacrifice themselves or their family on the altar of public opinion, despite the fact that it’s the very people who have been most vicious in their criticism of the couple who are also most vicious in their judgement of their decision to step back.”

For both to leave their respective countries to move to Canada is for their peace of mind. And that is the most important.

For their financial needs, some bumps came along during discussions with the Queen about their security and trademarks. They are not allowed to use the word ‘royal’ to refer to themselves, so their current website and social media must be changed.

Of course, commentaries had said the couple wanted their cake and to eat it too but let’s just give them the benefit of doubt and see what transpires in Spring 2020.

Their current statement on their website says, “As The Duke and Duchess of Sussex continue to develop their non-profit organisation and plan for their future, we hope that you use this site as the source for factual information. In Spring 2020, their digital channels will be refreshed as they introduce the next exciting phase to you.”

In other words, they are the best source for anything to do with them. Not the press, not anyone else. They will path their own journey and use whatever resources at hand.

What a wonderful twist to the fairy tale – the woman rescues the prince. For all the stories we were told growing up, fairy tales shaped some of our beliefs about love, the opposite sex, and how being a princess was, sometimes, the aim in life.

What makes Meghan and Harry different from Kate and Prince William is that Meghan is so far removed from anything British and royal, their union makes even the cynics among us feel a glimmer of hope. She defied the odds to marry Harry (or perhaps he did) and some of us rooted for their happily ever after.

And their happily ever after is one where the woman saves the man from the life he has always lived – under scrutiny, under criticism, a life that is almost not his. She has shown him how to put himself first, take care of his needs first, and how their union can beat all odds against them. Now that’s a fairy tale I’ll be telling constantly.

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